The ghost from the girlfriend's past


The training was going ‘miserably’ fun, as it was my first time hands on experience on a colour Television. After getting back from the factory, I was sweating excessively in gym. I was tired to hell and the walk to my home back was looking like never ending. Finally I reached my home and the body ache forced me to skip my dinner (first in my lifetime!) and go to my bed with full throttle AC.

********

“Mrigank actually I can’t give you my number...umm...I mean my parents don’t like me talking to boys. I am sorry.” said a beautiful voice, the person I had big crush on.

“Yeah! It’s OK no problem. So how can we be in contact after school?” I asked after a little embarrassment.

“We can be in contact through mails. It’s fun...I mean the anxiety of expecting a reply and then replying with a smile on. By the way, why didn’t you have lunch? Do you really take our fight that seriously?” she was playing my mind but that was a sweet feeling.

“Ya, you are a friend of mine rather the best friend here. A fight with you can leave me without my soul.” Now it was mine turn to play.

The conversation went on and on and then we left for home. After that we exchanged mails and then waited for the reply just like she said “anxiously”.
Then one day:

Sweetangel07- So... (This always happen when you talk face on face you have infinite things to say but while chatting nothing.)
Awesomeknight22- Hey can I tell you something? If you don’t mind...
Sweetangel07- Ya sure...why will I mind unless you say “I like you”...hahaha :D
Awesomeknight22- Ya thats what I wanna say “I like you” <3

Then a sudden silence....

Sweetangel07 has signed out.

I left sinking in my chair with my heart. ‘Shit! Fuck head look what have you done?’ shouted my mind. ‘C’mon man he did just fine. Why to hide your feelings?’ supported my heart. Now the chat has  begun between my mind and my heart.

YOU GOT A NEW MAIL!

I quickly opened it; it was from her. It read:

I don’t know what your problem Mrigank is? You always put me in a situation from which coming out is nearly impossible. Why you make things complicated? Can’t we remain friends only...as I like someone else.

It was over. I myself killed a beautiful relation of friendship. ‘Look fuck head, what I have you done?’ my mind was furious. ‘Shut up...you can still make it right...just apologize.’ My mind was right this time.
I replied back


Hey!
Look I am really sorry. I did not know what I was doing. I was very confused and that confusion was putting me on wrong lane. I had to tell you...can’t help
L

If possible do pardon me...

Then the silence took on our friendship and everything seemed to fall apart. I never told about this to anybody as I feared about mocking stuff on this rejection and my emotions got buried somewhere deep inside my heart.

Until last month...This dreadful time came back to haunt me in my dreams...

Sometimes I laugh thinking about this as how easily I lost a friend which mattered to me most and then I think ‘I took a chance at least to express what I feel, some even fail to do this!’ and then again I go and explore my dreams...

I know this is dismantled and I even know that I could have written something else which you demand; but sometimes...sometimes it feels lighter when we share our regrets and we share what we feel about. So, never fear to express yourself on time.

As believe ‘A chance lost is a change lost’...

Also read :
The girl with the blonde hair

Comments

  1. well u could have said i was just joking with this at the end of your sentence :D
    but you know some girl play this friendship card to play with feelings of boys who like them...i don't know what was her deal but still this thing was not something which could force a girl to break a friendship with someone

    be happy you deserved better than what she did :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya its true Teo my friend..was kidding was something I didn't want to say as I wanted to end that confusion there and then...but unfortunately it went up side down.
      I wish the one I deserve never do this to me.
      but thanks for finding out time to read my article :)
      Regards

      Delete
  2. well...wt i feel z...no damn prsn on dis earth actually hs a right 2 let sm1 down jus coz dat prsn had feelings fr him/her dat were beyond friendship...obviously,evrybdy hs different prefrences...n all....n nt evrybdy z destined into d lyf of d prsn whom dey wnt 2 share dere lyf wid...
    bt still...atleast fr d sake of humanity...one shud respect d feelings of dat prsn...n atleast give it thought dat hw much courage dat prsn must hve gathered 2 express d thngs...
    n in such a case...dere's no point of loosing a true friend...(tc applied...if dat prsn ws a true friend of urs)...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya I totally agree with you Ria :)
      I hope every single prson on earth feels the same as you did :)
      Dat person is a true friend of mine

      Regards

      Delete
  3. Thumbs up to ria's reply :-)
    May be she did it out of fear,confusion, family , society or to prove to some one else..
    To the girl:
    In the journey of our life, it's very rare to find people with such feelings for us
    Do yourself a favor
    When all the dust settles and any of the reason doesn't matter anymore (say after 10~20 year's)
    If their was anything like the one described above, Take some time out and let the guy know
    You have got an admirer, try not to turn him into a hater like everyone else out their :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True buddy...what you read above is true..with obviously some changes..But everything is settled now :)
      I don't know about other admirers but I don't want that I lose you and you stop reading my blog :)

      Delete

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