Sigma of life
Life was going through rough side both for my broadband service and my twenty four hours. Although partially atheist, I was yelling at god “Please put me on that planet which has more number of hours...please!”
But god was busy with the Euro cup 2012 and by the way ’Who cares about someone like me?’ I thought.
I was getting irritated due to excessive heat at training site and no connection with my friends due to internet service failure.
My nights were going like sand through my fist and my day seemed like longer than a year. Human beings have been programmed to work for their belly and their kin. Although there was no stipend for me during this training but this will eventually add on my resume and hence to my future job and hence to my future perspective and hence training.
One can easily sum of his life in following 11 steps to heaven:
Step 1: Thank god for the perfect mating of your parents.
Step 2: Come out of your mother’s womb after nine months of your parents romantic night. Now you will cry for some time and doctor explain this as ‘lungs and body pores opening’, but the truth is you are already aware of your rough future except if you are born with silver spoon.
Step 3: Even before you start crawling you will be pressurised to walk and then to run as you will be taught that life is a race.
Step 4: You join your school and then immediate pressure of marks otherwise no good stream and you know the trailing part of it.
Step 5: You take your stream and then literally fight for the best college. And then..whoosh Mr. Kapil Sibal comes and say “Score 80 percent and be eligible for IIT otherwise who cares about you all” and then the thought ‘Fuck IIT lets go easy’. You will then observe same condition in medical, commerce and arts.
Step 6: You get into a college where admission is easy and then parents start taunting “You are fucking nothing. How will you survive in this world?” and you have no answer except lowering your head and gazing your brand new converse.
Step 7: You somehow get past that humiliation are just itching to step into your first job when a voice echo inside your body ‘Oh fuck! I need to get married and need to get laid and hence need money. Do hell with the job lets go for higher studies.’
Step 8: You finish your higher studies with lot of efforts and get a high paid job (some lucky ones). You are happy that you will get married with your dream girl/boy or a hot babe/hunk.
Step 9: You get married and as some lucky guys get laid on the first night itself. And then you realize ‘Oh man! No contraceptive...I will become a father/mother!’ but still not sure whether you are happy or not.
Step 10: Now more money will be required for your child’s ice-cream, lollipops etc et etc and you are pressurised to get promotion and get big bucks.
Step 11: After fighting with the world and your wife/husband after being caught with your secretary (naturally, big bucks provide hot secy) you board the flight to heaven. But the cycle continues.....
This is how life goes and this is how it will continue to go. So good luck for the wooden spoon gainers and better luck next time for silver spoon guys and girls...
Also read :
The asthamatic life
The asthamatic life